How Worry Can Help You Attract Your Ideal Soulmate

Do you fear that your next relationship will be as bad or worse than your past or present one?

When you think about your parents’ or friends’ relationships does it scare the heck out of you to imagine that you could end up like that?

GREAT NEWS! Then you can use your negative feeling’s energy” to gather, sort and learn what you want and need in an ideal Soulmate relationship.

Life Change – the App contains 4 apps that help you turn your worries, doubts and fears into the best thing that ever happened to you. Soulmate Attractor, a free app, helps you gather, sort and learn. The in-app purchases: Belief Change and Karma Change help you remove blocks and limits to receiving and enjoying what you want and Emotion Transformer helps you transform negative feelings into powerful energy for constructive action. There is help to turn your worries, doubts and fears and that help can be found here in both IOS for Apple iPhone/iPad/iPod touch and Android Devices!

Singing hearts attract things to sing about

Does your heart sing with joy or melancholy?

If your answer is “joy“; then, you clearly notice more “good” things in your experience.

If your answer is “melancholy” (or sadness, or anger, or despair, etc); then, you clearly notice more “bad” things in your experience.

Both exist in your experience simultaneously. Whether your focus is on “good” or “bad”, is a choice, and typically an unconscious “habit”.

As you might know, because of deeply entrenched neural pathways, hidden in your unconscious mind, habits are not easy to “break”; but, with persistent right effort, absolutely can be. Life Change Coaching Program* leverages trained Facilitators, Life Change the App* and other “exercises” to help you break habits that hold you back and prevent you from seeing, feeling, enjoying the “good” in your life. With help*, you, too, can be singing through the holidays and on through the New Year.

Wishing you a joyous holiday!

*NOT intended to replace professional medical or psychological treatment.
singing hearts

5 Love Attraction Lessons from Music & Lyrics

5 Love Attraction Lessons from Music & Lyrics
1. Life is not always fair, just or nice! Many of us do not handle unfair, injustice or mean experiences well – I know I don’t but like a fine wine or cheese… I’m improving with age and experience. The main character in Music & Lyrics, Alex, having survived a break-up with his childhood friend and business partner, grieved, turned to escapist behaviors with drugs, alcohol and womanizing then spent 15+ years meandering aimlessly and dispassionately through life until he receives an unexpected opportunity to revive his career and return him to his glory days.

His soon to be love interest, Sophie, nursed a wound from a college relationship done bad and gone public. She nursed her wounds from the safe space of home and family only timidly putting herself out for fear of validating the unfair, unkind claims of her former lover.

2. It is way too easy to get stuck in a past sense of injustice related to a break-up. There are a million how-not-to books available and just as many telling readers how to get unstuck. Heart break, divorce equal hurt feelings that’s that: self-doubts, life-doubts, fear, confusion, despair and an extremely intense need to avoid repeating the experience need to be honored, evaluated and addressed. This is pure survival instinct! A period of time to grieve and mourn is natural and normal but is not intended to be permanent! Short term, it is valuable downtime when used for reflection, resolving and realignment but when prolonged, it blocks the ability to heal the hurt and go on with life in a meaningful and fulfilling way and becomes a barrier to attracting the love of your life into your life.

Long term the emotion felt is a valuable tool – energy to launch a greater, better than ever next and again, intensely felt emotions are the fodder for books, music, movies… and significant change!

3. Soul Mates push each other’s buttons revealing those stuck places. It seems cruel that the Universe puts two wounds together and then the buttons push and they find themselves bleeding all over again. Yet, the emotions of heartbreak and despair, confusion and even revelations are the seeds that grew into a beautiful melody with heartfelt lyrics. Without those emotions it would be difficult to write a song that resonated with a large audience who relate because they have or do feel the same way. And all those million how-not-to books and all those telling readers how to get unstuck were all written by people who have been there done that… Adversity in life serves a purpose but only if we apply their lessons learned!
Without emotion signaling some kind of discomfort, no change would take place. Soul mates tend to expose those areas where change is necessary, embarrassingly, uncomfortably!

4. Everything happens for a reason and the reason is good. Serendipity puts opportunity & unlikely people in place just in time for us to choose heal and move forward again or stay stuck. Who would have imagined a previously unknown girl, filling in for a friend whose job is to care for the plants, would not only be the salvation for his career and income but also the love of his life? That’s how it goes in Music & Lyrics. Only, however, in his own tangled web of emotions was he able to reach out for healing and simultaneously produce a hit song.

Like in the movie, life events fall into place perfectly whether we realize it or not. There is always a perfect order playing out in our lives and its timing is perfect.

5. We do, however, have freewill! When a person is stuck, they literally have a “shadow overhead” and a “cloud” that distorts their first impressions. Then, caught up in pain-drama and fears, even their ideal Soul Mate appears to be another heart break waiting to happen. There is a way back into love when you leverage downtime to reflect, learn and grow. Most of us need help to do that, especially at our lowest moments. The 5-step Attraction Process transforms pain and trauma into a powerful attracting energy for what you really want in a Soul Mate relationship. Followed by the Belief Change work you will eliminate barrier energy and clear the energetic path to attract your Soul Mate quickly and easily.

Way Back into Love by Adam Schlesinger from the movie Music and Lyrics
Verse 1 (Drew Barrymore or Haley Bennett)
I’ve been living with a shadow over head,
I’ve been sleeping with a cloud above my bed.
I’ve been lonely for so long,
Trapped in the past,
I just can’t seem to move on!
(Hugh Grant)
I’ve been hiding all my hopes and dreams away,
Just in case I ever need ‘em again someday.
I’ve been setting aside time,
To clear a little space in the corners of my mind.
Chorus (Both)
All I wanna do is find my way back into love.
I can’t make it through without a way back into love.
Ooo hooow
Verse 2 (Drew Barrymore or Haley Bennett)
I’ve been watchin’ but the stars refuse to shine
I’ve been searchin’ but I just don’t see the signs
I know that it’s out there
There’s gotta be something for my soul somewhere.
(Hugh Grant)
I’ve been looking for someone to shed some light
Not somebody just to get me through the night
I could use some direction
And I’m open to your suggestion.
Chorus (Both)
All I wanna do is find my way back into love.
I can’t make it through without a way back into love.
And if I open my heart again
I guess I’m hoping you’ll be there for me in the end.
Middle Eight (Drew Barrymore or Haley Bennett)
There are moments when I don’t know if it’s real
Or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration
Not just another negotiation
Chorus (Both)
All I wanna do is find my way back into love.
I can’t make it through without a way back into love.
And if I open my heart to you,
I’m hoping you’ll show me what to do.
And if you help me to start again
You know that I’ll be there for you in the end.

I look forward to hearing your success story! Namaste.
janet lee

© jan gentleman-ingersoll Eastern Shepherd, Inc. 2010

GAPS Analysis to Attract Your Soul Mate NOW

As a manager, supervising, mentoring or coaching his employees, my husband successfully uses a process he learned many years ago called GAPS Analysis.

For Soul Mate purposes, I modified the GAPS Analysis to fit your needs! In the following scenario, your EGO plays the role of supervisor, mentor, coach or… parent.

GAPS Analysis to attract a Soul Mate (or any goal really):

  • Goal – What is your goal? What exactly is it that you want?
  • Abilities – What is your current situation?

◦    What talents, skills – strengths – do you currently possess that enable you to achieve your goal?

◦    What talents, skills – improvement areas – do you realize that you need to develop to successfully achieve your goal?

  • Perceptions – How do others see your ability to achieve your goal? Specifically, for Soul Mate Attraction purposes, what does your EGO perceive as the GAP between your goal and the perceptive judgment of the cumulated database of past experience held in your unconscious mind? In other words, what beliefs do you hold that support or sabotage your ability to achieve your goal?
  • Strategy – What can and will you do to close the GAP? As mentioned in previous blogs, there are many strategies available – some permanent, others that are temporary at best.

When I first decided what an ideal Soul Mate looked like to me, then asked for him to show up in my life, I was totally impressed that one week later Mr. Perfect showed up! Interestingly, Mr. Perfect did not turn out to be Mr. Right forever, rather, he was Mr. Right for now – to teach me a lesson. Through that experience, I learned one more thing I did not want so I could add one more thing to my list that I do want. Very simply, I did not want someone who did drugs; I was very clear that what I want is a Soul Mate who is clean and sober.

The next Mr. Perfect turned out to be an incarnation of an aspect of my father that I hated, despised and I learned, deeply scarred me. Literally, as a child and my father’s daughter I had formed beliefs that “men could never be faithful”; “all men prefer 20 year old girls over a mature woman”; “no man is worthy of entrusting my heart to…” Can you see the incongruence?

I asked for an ideal soul mate; yet, unconsciously, I didn’t believe it was possible! As my father’s daughter and later, as a friend to a number of guys, I had stored countless volumes of data in the back of my mind – my unconscious – that supported the limiting belief that a soul mate experience absolutely positively would break my heart and could potentially even destroy my ability to ever enjoy life again as long as I lived… okay, I AM a bit melodramatic but then I truly am an emotional person who feels everything to the Nth degree.

Fortunately, I realized what was happening and discovered the process that I included in the free Master Mind Cleanse e-Guidebook that you received in yesterday’s blog.

It was enough clearing work to get me into my Ideal Soul Mate relationship which I remain in – happily – 15 years later.

If you did not pick up your free copy in yesterday’s blog, click this link and the Master Mind Cleanse Guidebook is yours instantly with minimal effort.  It takes very little of your time and yet accelerates your time to attraction exponentially as well as increases sustainability – as in permanently removes barrier energy.

  • You will identify those emotions that either attract or repel your ideal soul mate relationship.
  • You will then have the opportunity to literally reframe or neutralize any negative emotional charges that become repelling energy.
  • You will shift negatives beliefs into positives, signaling to God and the Universe that you are ready to attract the most amazing, exciting, fulfilling and LOVING soul mate in your life NOW!

The Master Mind Cleanse Guidebook helps you discover what beliefs are hidden in your unconscious mind and leads you through how-to align them to your conscious mind’s wants and desires.

However, like peeling a cathartic onion, there always seems to be another layer! And, some beliefs are so stubborn and fixed that they take a bit extra work to resolve. Consequently, the book Belief Change – The Book was born.

Belief Change – The Book, available at (including on Kindle), and Barnes and, contains the simple, 10-Step Belief Change Exercise contains the 10-Step Belief Change Exercise that helps you resolve stubborn limiting beliefs. The difficult ones that don’t shift easily. And if you are really lucky, this exercise can help you reach to the core and the whole onion disappears – forever!

Whichever belief reconciliation process you choose, you can be confident and certain that it is a strategy that will move you closer to realizing your dreams… permanently.

How will your life be different when the love of your life is in your life? We would love to hear from you in the comment section below.

Until next time, Namaste,

janet lee

Love Your Soulmate As Yourself…

“Love the Lord thy God with all your heart, mind and body and love your neighbor as yourself…” as shared by Jesus is a simple yet incomprehensibly powerful life principle.

When you love God with all your heart, mind and body, then your choices will consider and regard “good”: “higher Good”, “greater Good” or “good” in general… however, “good” can be relative; therefore, the genius in the second part. When you love your neighbor as yourself, “good” is put into an easily related perspective.

In other words, it is unlikely that you wish harm or evil upon yourself; therefore, when you find yourself in a moment of choice, stop, consider how and what you would want for yourself if and when you find yourself in the other person’s shoes. Then, act based on what you would want. Remember the timeless Golden Rule:

“Do unto others

as you would have them do unto you.”

Remembering and applying the Golden Rule to Jesus’ instructions is, however, usually, not enough.

Because what is important to me, may or may not be important to you. Truly loving your neighbor as your self would include taking the time to understand and comprehend the other person’s values when making your choices.

Truly loving another as yourself means you make and take the time to learn, know and act according to the other person’s values. This is especially important in the most intimate of all relationships – your soul mate.

A major relationship pitfall is treating your soul mate as you want to be treated or expecting them to psychically or naturally know what you want or need. Opposites attract and that is never more evident than between soul mates. This does not have to mean fatal attraction when you are aware and plan to respect your differences. For example, a dialogue that includes:

· I know I am loved when you…

· I really enjoy it when you do ___ …

· It is really important to me that my soul mate ___ …

Realistically, do not be surprised if you or your soul mate are unaware of a personal value system. Consequently, it would be a very good idea to preface your dialogue with a discovery exercise. Ask yourself and your soul mate the following questions:

· What’s most important to me about a soul mate relationship?

· What’s most important to me about our conversations?

· What’s most important to me about our freedom?

· What’s most important to me about our togetherness?

· What’s most important to me about our disagreements?

· What’s most important to me about our finances and money?

· What’s most important to me about our residence?

· What’s most important to me about our careers?

· What’s most important to me about our relationships with friends, family, children… separately and as a couple?

· What’s most important to me about being a parent and raising children?

· What’s most important to me about our religion?

· What’s most important to me about holidays?

· What’s most important to me about _____?

Most of us make a lot of assumptions when entering soul mate relationships; discovering the differences, reactively, often become the bricks that build walls that, over time, can become insurmountable. This exercise and dialogue minimize, eliminate or create the opportunity to plan for the inevitable differences that are a part of every significant human relationship.

I pray that this does not overwhelm you. I promise, if you will take the time to know your value system and to learn your soul mate’s value system then work together proactively to reconcile the inevitable differences and commit to love your soul mate as yourself, comprehending what is important to them from this day forward; then, not only will your life be more harmonious but your chances of a successful soul mate relationship are significantly improved. Another version of the Golden Rule that will help you remember and apply this concept is:

“Do unto others

as they would have you do unto them.”

janet lee

Life & Love Extraordinaire

Belief Change – The Book

© jan gentleman-ingersoll Eastern Shepherd, Inc. 2010